It’s important to celebrate our heroes. Real or imaginary, these men and women help us define our ideal selves. Sometimes these heroes are imbued with superhuman abilities, like the power of flight or telepathy, but much of the time, the attributes that make a superhero are inherently human. Heroes are characters that stand up for the weak and defenseless. They go beyond the call to raise up their fellow man. Heroes are not indestructible, but simply willing to give more of themselves without the need of thanks or admiration.
Yes, heroes are among us and within us, and on this day devoted to Superman, the Übermensch, I’ve curated a shortlist of strains that will imbue you with superhuman sensations that will hopefully enable you to do something heroic…or at least conquer the villainous forces of laziness and depression. Up, up, and away!
Allen Wrench
“This strain is pow!!! Gets you a super uplifting high with a great taste and smooth smoke not very harsh at all even when the bowl is almost ass and still tastes good and the smell is unbelievable super earthy citrus and could smell it from across my house, great strain won’t regret.” – sillbillybro
Maui
“Beautiful strain came on subtle and took over my whole body for a wonderful ride. I have permanent nerve damage due to an IED this stuff makes me feel like superman.” – Dungy51
Kryptonite
“Yup. So that’s what Superman feels like when he is flying. I got a top shelf, frosty, extra strength dose of this stuff. I hit in a vape… Pure, tasty and then BOOM! This stuff is no joke. . .tread lightly.” – Rhobert
Superman OG
“Faster than a speeding bowl-hit, more powerful than locomotive, it’s Superman OG! This wax is dank. Be sure to get it while it lasts at Delta-9 Association in San Jose.” – tgigrass
Incredible Hulk
“Very tasty, high energy strain. Perfect morning smoke to get your day started and the creative juices flowing, but smoke any more than a bowl and it hits you like a train with an incredibly strong cerebral high. Oh, and have some snacks ready because this shit is guaranteed to give you some extreme munchies.” – absentia882
Chemdawg
“8/10: I like this one a lot. She’s very much like an OG Kush but more leaning on the lighter side in terms of effects. She’s not gonna get ya stoned out ya brains, but what she does offer you is a nice full body high and the ability to eat 1,467,279 cheeseburgers and fries. So smile, relax, and just know everything’s gonna be just fine J” – beelzebub
Cinderella 99
“‘I am, I am, I am Superman, and I can do anything’… are not just lyrics from the R.E.M. song, but that’s how you will feel after smoking Cinderella 99. I felt like Superman flying over Market Street in San Francisco. It was an uplifting feeling. When I came back down to earth, I got wobbly legs and a pretty bad case of paranoia, all the people on the sidewalk with their shopping bags, the street performers were making me feel dizzy. That lasted maybe five minutes, then I felt like that first time you got baked, I mean really high. Time slows down, and you feel like everyone in the world knows you’re high. Fun times. I highly recommend for absolutely eliminating anxiety, stress, and aches and pains, just don’t overdo it. Go easy with this one.” – blackhawks15
While these strains might not make you leap over a building in a single bound, shoot lasers out of your eyes, or tear a phone book in half, they should pack a physical stimulation that encourages a sense of wellbeing that traverses the sativa/strains/indica continuum. Each strain is suited for a series of semi-heroic deeds that may include making a cape out of bed sheets or other household objects, jumping on a trampoline while wearing said cape, and donning a fist-forward flying motion while walking/running anywhere. Go forth, do good, and live on!
“I’m not a prophet or a stone aged man, just a mortal with potential of a superman. I’m living on.” – David Bowie